Yes, another typical day in the United Kingdom. When the buzz word (phrase) was global warming we were all looking forward to Mediterranean summers; who cares if the whole of Africa became a desert and the Sahara spread into Southern Europe. It meant that even a trip to Southend would mean a glorious warm day on the beach, followed by drinking too much for a dehydrated body to take and then trashing the joint – club 18-30 would be coming home.

However, what we have now noticed is that global warming was a slightly misleading phrase. The more accurate term is climate change and it seems like the UK is seeing that this year. So far it seems that all we have had is rain. If this weather is a result of climate change then things don’t look quite so nice for us… and we’ll have to keep going to Majorca.

There is an altogether more sinister reason that the weather has been so wet. Perhaps we are in the grip of some voodoo magic being channelled through that dreadful song by Rihanna, as long as she keeps blurting out ‘Umbrella’ we’ll have to keep using them.