Some days I feel fat, bald and a pathetic waste of the planet’s limited resources.
Other days I feel bad about myself.
But some days, I know that I can look after my body better, and try to do so. I’ll exercise, do my yoga and add colour to my cuisine. I realise that I can use the earth’s limited resources wisely. I will attempt to leave a footprint as small as I can. I’ll make wise decisions about what I need and what I don’t need. I still have little to no hair… but we are all uniquely different, and I love hats – today is a hat day.
I am easily knocked back. For as long as I can remember I have lacked confidence in what I do. I have to push myself to keep going, and sometimes, when I don’t feel particularly good about myself, that is difficult.
Quite often I find myself knocked back by things I have no control over. Anything that we can’t do something specific about, or even begin to influence in any way, is something beyond our control. There is no point in letting those things stop us from what we should be doing. It may be difficult, even emotionally painful, but we have to put those things to one side. If we can’t do anything about them, we just have to let them take their own course.
There are plenty of things I would like to change at the moment. These things would make me happier (or at least I believe they would), improve my situation and the situation of others. However, I can’t do anything specific about them at this time. These things are affecting my creativity and motivation. I have to put them aside. This doesn’t mean forgetting about them. It may be that at any moment there is something I can do, but until that moment arrives, I must continue with what I need to do.
This isn’t about allowing negative and bad and destructive things to happen to us. It is about knowing that they might. And, when they do, accepting them. If there is something we can do about them fine, if not, that is fine too. Some things we can change. We mustn’t let ourselves be immobilised by things we can’t.
I don’t feel great about myself at the moment. But today is a hat day, and the day is a gift to use wisely.